Today, as I sat here trying to finish another blog post, planning an upcoming garden party event for the ladies ministry at church; and thinking about my daugther Bella who is at school suffering -because she “doesn’t feel smart enough” I was overwhelmed with all kinds of feelings. I had so many thoughts running thru my head and my soul was so burdened.
To give you a little back ground I am a blogger, I work from home and I love being able to be a creative and get paid for doing something I love. But blog posts do require planning, pictures, editing, writing, more editing, and then submitting my work for it to be critiqued -so that I can make some final corrections that fit my clients needs. One of those posts was due yesterday. I am also planning an event for the ladies ministry of our church, which is about a week and a half away ( so crunch time). But the epicenter of what would cause my day to completely shake and crumble was my daugther Bella. She was attempting to do her math homework alone in her room and she failed to so, because she couldn’t read/comprehend the instructions. You see, she has dyslexia and so she requires for someone to read her the instructions. It is only then, that she is able to do the work and figure out the problem…but yesterday she became frustrated and hurt that she wasn’t able to do the work on her own. She doesn’t realize how brilliant she is.
Y’all as a mom, I can’t imagine anything else being this horrible, to see your child suffering from or because of something that you don’t have the power to remove. She has dyslexia and that bings forth so many challenges for her -challenges that I cannot take away. She broke down and just began crying out that she didn’t feel smart enough, that she didn’t understand why she was so stupid. And as the words came out of her mouth they would just cut my heart and shred it to pieces, because I would feel what these words meant, and the pain they carried. My little girl was so tired from working so hard and was so frustrated.
It was just an afternoon of having to lay it all down at the feet of Jesus. It was an afternoon of surrendering it all to HIM.
Today, I sit here in silence, playing Elevation Worship music in the background, (still recovering from yesterday) and I get overwhelmed with a feeling that someone out there needs to hear the following words: The Lord is telling you. Don’t be sad. you can’t do it on your own. Remember to surrender it to ME!
I want to be obedient and I want to share the words that have come into my heart and I want to share that I am praying for you, whoever you are, because the Lord wants to meet with you and wants to show you that in surrender there is PEACE, when you surrender you find HIM.
When you get to the point in your life when all you want is all HIM, then HE will meet you right where you are!